Home Men's Health How You Can Talk to Your Partner About Erectile Dysfunction

How You Can Talk to Your Partner About Erectile Dysfunction

by Glenn Fitzpatrick
couple in bed having problems and misunderstanding

When you’re struggling with the fact that you’re already having erection issues, it would be so great if you can just drink or sleep the problem away. Unfortunately, you can’t just stay in denial about impotence.

Erectile dysfunction will be painfully obvious, and your partner will find out one way or another. And that will surely have an impact on your relationship. So, how do you tell your partner you’ve got a problem with your uncooperative and unresponsive penis?

Erectile Dysfunction and Its Psychological Impact

Your sense of manliness, self-worth, self-esteem, and self-confidence can all go down the drain the moment you’re faced with the hard truth that your penis won’t get hard again. At least without some sort of medicinal intervention.

Despite the fact that Viagra has changed the landscape for men with erectile dysfunction and that even generic sildenafil is available now, it can still be devastating for a man to learn that he has become impotent.

In fact, a lot of men with erectile dysfunction develop anxiety and depression. Numerous studies have validated that erectile dysfunction can lead to depression and that depression can make erectile dysfunction worse.

From a psychological perspective, erectile dysfunction is simply a very difficult issue to deal with, especially when you’re trying to deal with it only by yourself. In truth, however, your partner is also greatly affected by your condition.

You may think that you’re the one who’s physically affected, but erectile dysfunction is actually a condition that can affect your partner emotionally and psychologically. On top of that, erectile dysfunction can also greatly impact your relationship, as well as your quality of life.

When you’re suffering from erectile dysfunction and you’re trying to hide it from your partner by avoiding sex, this can make your partner go through a wide range of emotions such as confusion, anger, anxiety, and even fear.

You may be wallowing in self-pity and not notice that your partner is struggling with questions like why you don’t want to have sex anymore. She may be anxious that you no longer find her attractive or sexually exciting. Or she could be afraid that you’ve met someone else.

When you don’t discuss erectile dysfunction as a couple, it can make you grow distant from each other and tear your relationship apart. You may feel that she’s not supportive of you. On the one hand, she may not understand that your impotence has a medical cause like a cardiovascular disorder. This is why it’s really important to talk about erectile dysfunction.

Discussing Erectile Dysfunction as a Couple

couple with bedroom issues

The best way to talk about erectile dysfunction is to simply be open and honest about it. You can start off by explaining to your partner about your medical condition and how your impotence came to be.

If you’re not sure how to explain that, you can ask your doctor for some materials that you can share with your partner. For sure, your healthcare provider would have given you information about possible treatment options.

While you’re discussing treatment options, keep in mind that erectile dysfunction cannot be easily reversed, nor will the treatment cure you overnight. Hence, it would be a good idea to talk about ways for both of you to still enjoy sex while you’re getting your treatment.

You can ask your partner if she will be comfortable with you giving her oral sex or you can also talk about other alternative ways for you to pleasure each other. This is also a good opportunity for the two of you to explore and discover new ways of being intimate with each other.

If both of you are having a difficult time understanding and accepting the loss of your ability to achieve erections, you may want to consider couples counseling. It’s not that couples counseling will help you regain your erectile function, but it may be able to help both of you deal with the situation better.

As erectile dysfunction is a complicated and psychologically burdensome matter to deal with, your conversation with your partner may be prolonged or it may be protracted. That can happen, so take your time. While you’re talking about it, here are a few other things you both need to keep in mind.

No blaming

Whatever has caused your erectile dysfunction, you both need to understand that it’s not your fault, nor is it your partner’s fault. Blaming each other or yourself won’t cure your impotence.

It’s not just you

Erectile dysfunction is a very common condition and it doesn’t affect just you. In fact, millions of other couples are probably going through the same thing that the two of you are struggling with right now.

It can be treated

erectile dysfunction diagnosis and treatment

Fortunately, several treatment options for erectile dysfunction are now available. Prescription medication for the condition is no longer as inaccessible as it was before, considering that there are now several manufacturers of generic sildenafil. And the drug has become cheaper, too.

Alternative Treatment Options

Of course, a prescription medication for erectile dysfunction isn’t your only option. Thanks to the countless scientific studies on the topic, researchers have discovered various alternative treatments for erectile dysfunction.

Many of these alternative treatment options have already been established as safe and effective. For instance, numerous studies on herbs like Tongkat Ali, Tribulus Terrestris, and Horny Goat Weed have shown that these natural erection boosters can really benefit men with erectile dysfunction.

If you take a look at how Horny Goat Weed works, you’ll find that it’s actually similar to sildenafil. This means that Horny Goat Weed can also inhibit phosphodiesterase-5 (PDE5) and help raise your cyclic guanosine monophosphate (cGMP) levels so that enough blood will fill your penis and make it sufficiently erect.

In truth, Horny Goat Weed is best taken with Tongkat Ali and L-arginine. For one, Tongkat Ali has multiple effects on the male reproductive system such as increasing your testosterone production and improving your sperm count and quality. More importantly, Tongkat Ali can also help you prolong your erection.

L-arginine, on the one hand, is an amino acid that works as a vasodilator by increasing your nitric oxide levels. In short, L-arginine helps your blood vessels to function better and deliver more blood to your penis, thus allowing you to achieve erections more easily.

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