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PDA – How Much Is Too Much?

by Glenn Fitzpatrick
couple kissing in public

Have you experienced people telling you to get a room? If you have, it’s probably because you went overboard in expressing your affection for your partner. It’s common to see other people publicly displaying their affection, but there are certain lines that shouldn’t be crossed.

For instance, being too affectionate during a religious service or in front of a friend who’s in mourning is just too tacky and inappropriate. It’s a great thing if you and your partner have a lot of passion for each other but other people may not appreciate your public displays of sweetness. Here’s what you should keep in mind about PDA.

What’s the Rule?

There’s isn’t any fixed rule with regard to public displays of affection. What’s acceptable in certain situations may be unacceptable in other circumstances. If you’re at a family gathering, for instance, kissing your partner’s forehead or cheek may look sweet but that same action certainly won’t be acceptable when you’re at the office.

  • Context

Be mindful of where you are, who you’re with, and the occasion. If you’re out with a group of friends, mild public displays of affection may be tolerable. However, avoid overdoing it so that you don’t end up making the other people around you feel uncomfortable.

  • Mother’s approval

Even if it sounds too old-fashioned, try to remember that when you’re in public, you’re surrounded by people of all ages and sensibilities. So, if you’re uncertain whether your behavior would be met with disapproval, ask yourself if your mother would approve if she happened to see you.

  • Partner’s comfort level

Another thing that you should always be mindful of when publicly displaying affection is whether your partner is comfortable with it or not. If what you’re doing is already making your partner feel a little bit embarrassed, then maybe you should until you’re in a more private setting before you show your affection.

What’s Acceptable?

PDA isn’t always bad. Indeed, there are certain affectionate behaviors that are acceptable even when done in public. Here are a few.

Holding hands

It’s always nice to see couples holding hands. It’s a sweet sign of affection that tells your partner you’ll always be by her side. Holding hands in public is no longer as frowned upon as it used to be decades ago.

holding hands while walking by the beach

Just remember where are you are before you hold your partner’s hand. Holding hands would obviously be inappropriate if you’re attending a lecture or you’re in the middle of a business meeting. And just so you know, there are quite several countries which do not tolerate public displays of affection, even when you’re just holding hands.

Physical contact

When you’re in public, touching and other forms of physical contact would really depend on which part of your partner’s body you’re touching, as well as the context of your situation. Obviously, touching your partner’s private parts would be considered inappropriate if there are other people around.

However, an arm casually draped around your partner’s shoulders would be considered acceptable if you’re in a casual setting, like when you’re out with family members or at a party at a friend’s house.

Kissing

There are many situations wherein kissing someone you love is acceptable. If you’re at the airport, for instance, and you’re bidding your loved one goodbye or welcoming her back after a long trip, a kiss wouldn’t be considered inappropriate. As long as it’s not too torrid or drawn out, that is.

A long and passionate French kiss, however, would be met with disapproval if you’re at a public place. You may want to reserve that for later when the two of you are in a more private setting.

What’s Not Acceptable?

Here are some examples of certain forms of PDA that are considered too much.

Groping

No matter how much you want to have sex with your partner, groping is never appropriate when you’re in public. In fact, it may even be considered criminal sexual behavior. So, the next time you’re in public, remember to refrain yourself from touching your partner’s breasts, nipples, buttocks, and inner thighs.

Nibbling

If you want to upgrade your foreplay skills, try practicing nibbling. Just don’t do it in public because that would be a case of too much PDA. The same goes for licking any part of your partner’s body.

Digital PDA

lip-locked selfie

No matter how crazily in love you are with your partner, openly posting, texting, or communicating your affection for her in a social network or broadcast message is inappropriate, especially if your post or message contains intimate details.

It’s fine if you want the whole world to know that you love your partner, but telling the world that sex last night was totally mind-blowing or that you’re absolutely fascinated by your partner’s breasts is just over the top.

Get A Room

If you can’t contain your affection for your partner to yourself, get a room or take your partner somewhere where nobody else can see your passionate display of affection. Your partner will surely appreciate how open you are about showing your feelings for her if it doesn’t involve any behavior that might potentially cause her embarrassment.

Private displays of affection are more touching and intimate, and can even serve as great foreplay. But if your goal is to really heat things up in the bedroom, you need to be ready with a rock-hard erection and inexhaustible sexual stamina.

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